Flood Jokes

Flood Jokes

It was raining so much I saw a sparrow putting sandbags around 
its nest!

  It was a terrible storm. Six inches of rain had fallen in the 
first twenty-four hours. Eight had fallen on the second day. The 
entire town was flooded. Over at the Bronson house, little Jimmy 
Bronson, eight-years-old, sat at the window of his upstairs room 
and stared outside. He was looking at a sun hat that was floating 
in one direction for a while, then seemed to get caught up and 
start to float back toward the house. The process went on for hours.
  Jimmy's uncle came by the house to see if all was well, and saw 
his nephew staring.  He started to look too, and couldn't understand
why the hat kept moving up and back, up and back.
  Finally he asked Jimmy, "What's going on down there?"
  Jimmy said, "That's Pa.  Last week he said, `Come hell or high 
water, I'm going to mow the lawn Saturday!'"

Making the best of the Floods

Pro: You can have a fishing contest from the couch in your living
room. Con: Your couch doesn't float.

Pro: Sun tanning on the roof of your house is cool.
Con: Sleeping there stinks.

Pro: Washing dishes just got easier.
Con: All your food is underwater too.

Pro: You can practice your diving skills...
Con: ...until you hit that small awning over your back door.

Pro: You can finally reach those dead branches.
Con: Now you just have to find the tree trimmer.

Pro: You can finally slam dunk.
Con: You have to dive to the basket.

Pro: "Sometimes, if you stand on the bottom rail of a bridge and lean
      over to watch the river slipping slowly away beneath you, you
      will suddenly know everything there is to be known."  - Pooh
Con: Bridge slipping along with river.

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