You might be in sales or marketing if all of your T-shirts are from trade shows you can charge extra for bugs and later charge more for fixing them you have more flying hours than a commercial pilot you can build up frequent fly mileage to go to Australia in 2 weeks the feature set of the product is dynamically linked to what your brain can generate on the fly when you talk to a customer you lose concentration after 3 consecutive technical terms you can sell customers any prototypes you find sitting in the lab you sell something first then forget to tell the engineers to build them until after they are due your idea to motivate engineers is to give them rides in your Ferrarri going to bars is considered overtime when doing a demo you forget what it is precisely that the thing is supposed to do Comdex in Las Vegas is the ultimate party event your cellular phone bill is proportional to your commission you can manage to charge extra for bugs you throw in the Brooklyn bridge as an incentive to close a deal your product specifications are written on both sides of a napkin you've ever passed a "Virus Hoax" to all your colleagues, when the bottom of the message contained an obvious sales pitch from the originator. you have ever paid someone (probably at BestBuy or Radio Shack) to install PC hardware or to scan/remove viruses from your PC. your VCR at home has flashed 12:00AM for the last five years. you have no idea how to change the preset stations on your car stereo. Think "connecting with a customer" involves dialing a number Realize 90% of your wardrobe consists of denim shirts with logos on them While at lunch, wonder how the company can sell more products and promptly expense lunch Think "repeat business" refers to a particularly boring work week Prepare for customer contact by reading Golf Digest Refer to your client contact list as the "sucker folder" Chomp stogies so that you can hide your laughter when a customer says, "Really, you can do that?" Describe all bugs with the words "it hangs" Think engineers have it easy Think engineers think sales people have it easy You get your, "you may be an ..." list from someone else instead of building it yourself. you thinks rocks are edible, and can be sold as a food product. you can name more than 6 "Days of Our Lives" episodes. you think ascii is a yogurt flavoring A sportsman went to a hunting lodge and bagged a record number of birds, aided by a dog named Salesman. The next year he returned and asked for Salesman again. "The hound ain't no durn good now," the handler said. "What happened!" cried the sportsman. "Was he injured?" "No. Some fool came down here and called him `Sales Manager' all week instead of Salesman. Now all he does is sit on his tail and bark." |
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