Hickophonic to English Dictionary

Hickophonic to English Dictionary


   One of the interesting things to learn about going to the 
south has been trying to understand the conversation which 
goes on around you. I have developed a whole new appreciation 
for language and culture.  
Witness: The Atlanta School Board, sensing that Oakland is 
about to cash in with the "Gummit" by labelling Black slang 
as a language, "Ebonics," has decided to pursue some of 
that endless taxpayer money pipeline through Washington by 
designating Southern slang, or "Hickphonics," as a language 
to be taught in all Southern schools. A speaker of this would 
be a Hickophone.
   Here are excerpts from the Hickphonics-English dictionary:


ABODE: a piece of wood, as "Han me a bode to put on the fire."

AID: noun. what a hen lays

AINTS: noun, insect. He's got aints in his paints

ALL: noun. A petroleum-based lubricant.   Usage: "I sure hope 
     my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck."

ARN: Ma's tard of arnin

ARTERY: The study of painting

AUTO: (should) - "I auto go to work, but ahm tared."

AX: (question) - "Ah ax you this."


BACTERIA: The back door of the cafeteria

BAG: He bagged her to marry him

BAHS: noun. A supervisor.   Usage: "If you don't stop 
      reading these Southern words and git back to work, 
      your bahs is gonna far you!"

BALKS: (a square thaing) - like a "match balks"

BAMMER: noun. The state just west of Jawjuh.  Capital is 
        Berminhayum. Usage: "A tornader jes went through 
        Bammer an' left $20,000,000 in improvements."

BARD: verb. Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."   
      Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."

BARE: noun. An acloholic beverage made of barley, hops, 
      and yeast.  Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."

BARIUM: What the doctors do when patients die 

BARN: (hatched) - "I was barn in nineteen forty and three."

BIT: A wager as in, "I bit you can't spit that watermelon
     seed across the porch longways."

BOB WAR: noun. A sharp, twisted cable. Usage: "Boy, stay 
         away from that bob war fence.

BOWEL:   A letter like A, E, I, O, or U

BRAID: (lot braid) - what you eat when u'ins outta biscuits.

BRESH:  He had a bresh with the law, and the law won.

BUB:  the light bub burned out

BYTE:  First word in a kiss-off phrase.


CAESARIAN SECTION: A neighborhood in Rome 

CAD: (to tote) - "I cad ma bride over the threshold."

CAT SCAN: Looking for Fluffy

CAUTERIZE: Made eye contact with her 

CHEER: (whut you sit on) - Pull up a cheer and set down.

CHINY:  country over in Asia

CHUCH DUDS:  Sunday go-to-meetin clothes

CLUM:  he sure clum that tree fastern any 'coon

COLIC:   A sheep dog

CORE:  He got hisself a new Ford core

CRICK:  a small stream

CURSOR: What some guys do when they are mad at their wife 
        and/or girlfriend.

CYOW:  Animal on Farm


D & C: Where Washington is

DAINZ:  Satidy night social

DEPPITY:  He helps out the shurf

DID: (not alive) - as "He's did."

DIGITAL CONTROL: What yore fingers do on the TV remote.

DRIBBED:  He dribbed milk on his shirt


EAR: noun. A colorless, odorless gas (unless your'e in LA).
     Usage: "He cain't breathe ... give 'im some ear!"

ELLUM:  A graceful tree

ENEMA: Not a friend


FAINCE:  Whats round the hawg lot

FANGER:  what you put your rang on

FAR: A burnin' pile of sticks.

FARN:  adjective. Not local.  Usage: "I cuddint unnerstand 
       a wurd he sed...must be from some farn country."

FAT: noun, verb.  1. a battle or combat.  2. to engage in 
     battle or combat. Usage: "You younguns keep fat'n, n' 
     ah'm gonna whup y'all."

FLAR:  a rose is a purdy flar

FLOPPY: When you run out of Polygrip.

FRASH:  them aigs ain't frash

FUSSED: Whut comes before second?

FURINERS:  All non-'bamans

FURRED:  He got furred from his job


GENITAL: Not a Jew

G.I. SERIES:   A soldiers' ball game 

GRAIN:  She was grain with envy

GULL: A young female human.

GULLY WORSHER:  a medium heavy rain

GUMMIT: Noun. A bureaucratic institution. Usage: "Them gummit 
        boys shore are ignert."


HAIL:  where bad folks go

HANGNAIL: A coat hook

HARD:  got a brend new hard hand

HARD DRIVE: Trying to climb a steep, muddy hill with 3 flat 
            tires and pulling a trailer load of fertilizer.

HAZE: a contraction. Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah ... 
      haze ignert. He ain't thanked but a minnit 'n 'is laf."

HEAVEN: (having) - A'm heaven some folks in foah dinnah.

HEAVY DEW: phrase. A request for action. Usage: "Kin I heavy dew 
           me a favor?  Go bah me that Linnerd Skinnerd tape"

HEIDI: noun.  Greeting.

HEP: Poor George, he can't hep it, he was born with a silver 
     spoon in his mouth.

HERN:  It aint hern, it's his'n

HILLBILLY:  People in the next county

HIRE YEW: Complete sentence.  Remainder of greeting.  
          Usage: "Heidi. Hire yew."

HOD: adverb. Not easy. Usage: "A broken hot is hod to fix."

HOLLAR:  whats between the hills

HOT: noun. A blood-pumping organ.


ICE COOL: A school for younguns befoe college.

IGNERT: adjective. Not smart. See "Arkansas native."   
        Usage: "Them N-C-TWO-A boys sure are ignert!"

IMPOTENT:   Distinguished, well known 


JAWJUH: noun. A state just north of Florida.  Capital is 
        Lanner. Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my 
        pickup truck."

JEW HERE: Noun and verb contraction. Usage: "Jew here that 
          my brother from Jawjuh got a job with that bob 
          war fence cump'ny?"


KEYBOARD - Place to hang your truck keys.


LABOR PAIN: Getting hurt at work

LAIG:  Most folks have two of them

LAN: To borrow as in, "Hey Delbert! LAN me yore truck."

LATHER:  what you climb up

LAYMAN:  a sour fruit

LIBERRY:  where you go to check out books for larnin

LOT (undark) - "Jeannie with the lot-brown haar."


MAILK:  what you get from cyows

MEDICAL STAFF:  A doctor's cane

MERE:  what you see your self in

MINNERS:  Live bait

MISRUS:  Married Woman

MODEM: how you got rid of your dandelions.

MUNTS: noun. A calendar division.  Usage: "My brother 
       from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I ain't 
       herd from him in munts."


NAR:  Opposite of wide

NAYK:  Your head sets on it

NETWORK: Activity meant to provide bait for your trot line.

NITRATES: Cheaper than day rates

NODE: Was aware of



ORREL:  Them hinges need orrel

ORMY:  What the sojers go in

OUTPATIENT: A person who fainted


PACKET: What you do to a suitcase or Wal-Mart bag before a trip.

PAINTS:  what cha put on your laigs of a mornin

PANK:  a light red color

PAP SMEAR: A fatherhood test

PARCH:  sit out on the parch and watch the grass grow

PELVIS: Elvis' nickname

PETITION:  What separate the rooms

PIN: Whut you keep hawgs in....a hawg pin.

POKE:  a paper bag or sack

POKEY:  what the shurf and deppity puts crimnals in

POP:  a soft drink

PUPPET:  what the preacher is in

PURDY:  She is purdy as a pitcher

PURT NEAR:  almost; he purt near caught that greased pig


RAH CHEER:  I was born rah cheer in town

RAINCH:  A big cow farm

RANCH: noun. A tool used for tight'nin' bolts. Usage: 
       "I thank I left my ranch in the back of that pickup
        truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

RANG:  you wear it on your fanger

RAT CHEER: (not there)....(Here) - Like "Lay it rat cheer."

RAT:  Do it rat now!

RATS: noun. Entitled power or privilege.  Usage: "We 
      Southerners are willin' to fat for are rats."

REBOOT: What you do when the first pair gets covered with
        barnyard stuff.

RECOVERY ROOM: A place to do re-upholstery 

RECTUM: Dang near killed `em

RETARD: Verb. To stop working. Usage: "My grampaw retard 
        at age 65."

ROM: Delicious when you mix it with coca cola.

ROONT:  She plum roont her shoes

RUT:  that there tree sure has long ruts


SALARY:  A stringy vegetable

SEED: verb, past tense of see.

SEIZURE: A Roman emperor

SHAR:  A light rain

SHURF:  The Shurf put Clem in jail

SKEERED:  that plumb skeered me to death

SOARDEENS:  small canned fish

SPRANG:  Water out'n the ground

SQUARSH: noun. A vegetable (also verb - to flatten). Usage: 
         "Warsh that squarsh...you don't know where its been!

STORCH:  this here aprn has to much storch in it

STOW: A place that sells stuff.


TABLET: A small table

TAR: noun. A rubber wheel.  Usage: "Gee, I hope that 
     brother of mine from Jawjuh  don't git a flat tar 
     in my pickup truck."

TARRED: adverb. Exhausted.   Usage: "I just flew in from 
        Lanner and boy my arms are tarred."

TERMINAL ILLNESS: Getting sick at the airport 

THANK: verb. Ability to cognitively process. Usage: "Ah 
       thank ah'll have a bare."

THO:  tho me the ball

THOAT:  I shore got a sore thoat

THUD: what comes after second?

TIN-SIN-STOW: (5 & 10) "Let's go to the tin-sin-stow."

TIRE: noun. A tall monument. Usage: "Lord willin' and 
      the creek don't rise, I sure do hope  to see that 
      Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."

TUMOR: A total of at least three


URINE: Opposite of you're out


VIEW: contraction: verb and pronoun.  Usage: "I ain't never 
      seed New York City... view?"


WAR: a bobbed war faince

WARSH: verb. To clean.

WARTER:  what you worsh your face in

WORSH:  go worsh your face


Y'ALL: noun. A degree of rotation. Usage: "There are three 
     degrees of Southern rotation: Pitch, Roll, and Y'all."

YURP:  a continent overseas


 Taixas - Texas
 Ole Missipi - Mississippi 
 Alabamr - Alabama
 Jawjaw -Georgia
 Flawda - Florida
 South Calinah -South Carolina
 Nawth Calinah - North Carolina
 Virginny - Virginnia
 Caintuck - Kentucky
 New Yawk - New York

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