What do you call a guy with no arms or legs... In a swimming pool BOB Gets carried around in the ghetto BLAIR Spins on a wheel CLAY Sits in a bun FRANK Gets passed among friends JAY Gets shit on JONN Gets thrown LANCE Sits by the side of the road MARK Is filled with vacationers VAN Is filled with patients WARD Is read by lawyers WILL In a British restroom? LOU In a bank vault? RICH In a porn flick? DICK In a sound system? MIKE In a sandwich? REUBEN Being climbed on? JIM Put through a meat grinder? CHUCK Being torched to death? BERNIE In your gas tank? PHIL Under a steamroller? LANE In your drums? TOM Stuffed in a carryall? PACO Starving to death? LES Being cooked by cannibals? STU In a hayloft? BARNEY Being stoned to death? ROCKY In a chicken coop? HENRY On a French farm? HECTOR On your doorstep? MATT Lying on a barbers floor? HARRY Lying in a cash register? BUCK Lying in a mailbox? MEL In a box with his arms and legs? KIT Being run through a sawmill? CHIP Playing Volleyball? SPIKE On the edge of a mountain? CLIFF At sunrise? DON In a brothel? HORACE In the river near the bank? DOC Up a chimney? SMOKEY Who is just average? NORM A gay guy with no legs? NEIL In a pile of leaves? RUSSELL Same guy, 6 months later PETE On the wall ART Also doesn't have a tongue? TASTELESS ART Thrown off a high speed boat SKIP Laying under your car? JACK In a valley? GLENN In your mailbox? BILL Woman who puts him in the fireplace BURNADETTE In a fitness center? JIM Left out in the sun WILT Covered with cement ROCK Over a fence HOMER In a lingerie drawer TEDDY Nailed to your spice rack HERB & BASIL Covered in oil? DEREK Stuck in a wall? BRAD In a coffee cup? JOE On a beach SANDY Throwing up CHUCK Twin boys hanging over the window CURT 'N' ROD Thrown against the wall MARK In a bottle POP Hit by lightning ROD One arm and Parkinson's shaving NICK In the rapids EDDY Just been disintered? DOUG 5 men swimming with a woman? BOB, BOB, BOB, BOB, BOB, and ANN (think Beach Boys.) Hanging from a chain destroying buildings? REX What do you call a guy with no arms or STUMP THE BAND legs who can play 5 Musical instruments? What do you call a gal with no arms or legs... With one leg? EILEEN Chinese woman with one leg? IRENE After the operation? NOLEEN On your barbecue? PATTY In a sugar vat? CANDY When she's your sister's kid? DENISE In a sewer? FLO Eaten by a Gila Monster? LIZ Being shot out of a cannon? AMY Being stoned for immorality? CYN Stuck on a wall? PEG In a backpack? CARRIE In a shotgun wedding? MARY Being screwed by a horse? MARE Caught by a trawler? ANNETTE Ensnared in a lawsuit? SUE Trying to figure how she got that way? WANDA Who likes yellowish semi precious stones? AMBER With really big ears? BUNNY With lots of freckles? DOTTY In a pan of boiling water? BLANCHE On the bottom of the ocean? SANDY In the Christmas choir? CAROL At 12am on Jan. 1st? EVE In the summer? JUNE At sunrise? DAWN In a truck? LORI In a china closet? CRYSTAL Hanging from a ceiling? TIFFANY Who's been force fed beans GAIL At the end of a long March APRIL In a fry pan PAM In the flowerbed? ROSE, IRIS, LILY, DAISY, PETUNIA or VIOLET |
|