PeeWee Herman Jokes



  I understand that the Pee-Wee line of clothing is discounted now 
in the stores. In fact Pee-Wee's pants are half off.



What are Pee-Wee Herman's favorite baseball teams?
The Expos and the Yanks.



How many times did Pee Wee Herman had sex last year?
Just a handful of times!



Did you read in the Enquirer who Pee Wee Herman is currently dating?
'Thing' from the Adam's Family!



The guy down the street has a great new job (his words)...
He is going to be Pee Wee's right hand man!



Pee Wee Herman now has a job as a movie critic.  
Last night he saw a pornoflick and gave it 300 thumbs up.



Why's Bobbitt being counseled by Pee Wee Herman?
So he can find out how to hold on to his penis.



What do Bobbitt and Pee Wee Herman have in common?
Both had their dicks exposed in public.



What does Pee Wee Herman do when he need a 900 number?
He lets his fingers do the walking.



What do Ike Turner and Pee Wee Herman have in common?
They both like to beat their meat.



What do you get when you cross Popeye with Pee Wee Herman?
Creamed spinach.



Michael Jackson and Pee Wee Herman are have come 
out with a new video called... 
"I'll beat it for you."



How is Pee Wee Herman like Lee Harvey Oswald?
They were both found to have acted alone.



When does Pee Wee like to go to the movies?
When he hasn't been in the pink.



What did Pee Wee say about "Saturday Night Fever?"
"It's got a good dance and you can beat to it."



How do we know Pee Wee Herman was guilty?
He got caught red handed.



What are Pee Wee's favorite songs?
"Easy to be Hard", and "Momma Told Me not to Come."



What's worse than sitting in front of Pee Wee in a theater?
Surviving a plane crash with Jeffrey Dahmer.



What is Pee Wee's idea of safe sex?
Cutting his fingernails.



What is Pee Wee's favorite record album?
"Beat the Meatles."



What is Pee Wee's favorite game?
Handball.



Why doesn't Pee Wee masturbate in the theater anymore?
He got picked up by the fuzz and decided he liked it.



What is Pee Wee Herman's idea of a perfect secretary?
Someone who can take shorthand, as well as give it.



Did you hear that Pee Wee Herman plays the penguin's 
father in the new Batman movie?  
I'd rather have him on screen, than sitting behind 
me in the theater.



Pee Wee Herman has opened a dry cleaning store. 
Their motto? "Drop your Pants and Jacket off here."



What is the difference between Pee Wee Herman and
 Rodney King?
Pee Wee beat himself. 



What's Pee Wee's favorite holiday?
Palm Sunday. 




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